So after almost 3 weeks I finally manage to get internet access at work.  And it turns out that though I can access Facebook, iGoogle plus feeds and indeed WordPress itself I can’t access my gmail account.  Which makes perfect sense.

So I can genuinely waste my time but can’t actually do anything useful.  And of course because I’m conscientious (and because it’s actually in my favour to go home after 6 until I get my bloody parking permit sorted) I don’t use it during work hours.  Just in case I didn’t make that plain enough – not during work hours.

Back = covered.


So I was catheterising someone this evening (at work, not just for fun) and as I was preparing all the stuff he said to me, ‘Do you have any scissors there doctor?’. Er, yes. Why? ‘Oh, I was wondering if you could trim my pubes for me…’. Ermmmmm…I’ll ask the nurses after. All that from a very sick guy in his 70s. He was being serious. Ha ha ha. Pretty fucked up.


And then tapas with friends. And tomorrow all alone on the ward which means it’s going to be a stressful and long day and also means I can’t bitch slap my SHO for giving me his chest infection. I’ve got that wheeze and heaviness coming on and a catch in the throat. Bastard. Don’t want to be ill.

It’s felt like a crappy day.  Felt like as I’m not entirely convinced it had reason to be a crappy day but that’s what it felt like to me.  I’ve been so tired.  Up early as we were post take and had a lot of patients to sort out, some quite sick.  My eyes were tired today and I’ve just been lacking energy.  Didn’t go to We will rock you in the end as I felt so drained when I finished I just couldn’t cope with it.  Plus I’d decided during the day that I didn’t really want to go anyway.  So got home and promptly fell asleep for almost 2 hours.  I need to start getting early nights.  I mean real early nights.  It’s not going to happen anytime soon.

I’ve noticed I’m clenching my jaw again which is something I do when I’m stressed.  I’m having to concentrate on not doing it as it’s making me tense and giving me a headache.

Probably the best thing to happen today was that I got to dictate my first discharge letter (opposed to just writing them out by hand).  Using the little dicta-phone thing was really fun.  I so want one.  God knows what I’d do with it but it’s fun to play with.

Sleep now.

I almost forgot to go to sleep in the end last night.  Then I forgot to set the alarm and almost didn’t wake up.  I’m rubbish.  Unlike the day.  Which despite being work, was quite fun.

Though my sink’s blocked and I have a ton of washing up to do.

This has been such a shit week. Such a shit week. Today was just as bad. Busy, stressed, overworked, under-supported. Got shouted at by a Consultant because he wouldn’t admit that it was him that made the mistake, not me. That pissed me off. Plus, I’ve been so tired today (admittedly self induced, so no sympathy) and I had to work a 13 1/2 hour shift (plus gearing up to work the weekend). But then ward cover was quiet and I got home and then three things really cheered me up and made me forget all the rest of it. In order of amusement / geekiness / amazingness:

1. Flagpole Sitta (Lip Dub) : pure genius; I want to know people like that. The girl who starts off is really hot too. Plus, the actual band who did the original (Harvey Danger) are releasing their third album as a free download here. Not listened to it yet but hey – it’s free.

2. New trailer for the Giant Fucking Robot Movie (again, not robotic porn) and it looks badarse! Check out Blackout (the chopper) and Starscream (the jet) as they change mid-flight! Ok, so I had to wiki the names to find out what they’re called. I’m not that much of a geek.

3. Then: I got an email from two friends of mine. And they are getting married! AWESOME! Not only because they are both wonderful and people I consider friends but even more so because: I introduced them! Through my blog! Ha ha ha. I met them both individually while bumming round the States in 2003 (Kristin from North Carolina in South Carolina and Phil from Switzerland in Truth or Consequences, New Mexico). Later I introduced them to LiveJournal, then they started talking then they both came over to see me almost two years ago now (really that long?) and they’ve been together since (pretty much). And now they’re getting married.

So yeah! Awesomeness. And I think that means I have to be set up with a bridesmaid as repayment. Ha ha.

Plus, after a fun night out with friends, I went to sleep cuddled up to someone else last night. Which is always nice. No funny business. Well behaved. You know me. Just sleep because sometimes that’s all you want.

After being single for a while I find myself craving the little things like close contact with another person, rather than the bigger things. Sex is one thing but I can cope quite well without it. That contact though is something else. Cuddles, holding hands, falling asleep with someone wrapped in your arms, their breath against your neck, the smell of their hair as it gets caught in your beard (fairly specific to me that one). Knowing that when you wake in the morning there will be someone beside you. Usually. You forget how warm people are, and the sounds they make just to exist.

I’ve always had an issue though in that while I love sleeping with someone else (and again, I’m talking about sleep, opposed to sex), I can never sleep well. I’ve always been crap at sleeping whether though insomnia or distraction or just forgetfulness (seriously). I never fall asleep first and find myself in that situation where your sleeping partner falls asleep cuddled up to you and you feel like you can’t move in case you disturb them. An arm goes dead. You can’t sleep on your back. You get neck ache. You worry about it and then eventually half the night has gone by, you’ve got the new single by the Arctic Fucking Monkeys stuck in your damn head for hours and you realise you’re about to embark on a 13 hr shift…he hem, or something like that.

I wouldn’t give it up for the world but I almost prefer staying up to experience it. As long as I can get a good sleep after.

She’s a new friend. She’s nice. We like each other’s company. She leaves in a week’s time but that’s ok.

And speaking of sleep…

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